Believe: Self Control October 1, 2017

Believe: Self Control

October 1, 2017

 I went to visit my mom and dad when the kids were young. You know my mom. She always had something to eat and often sent something home with me. Most of the time, she had chocolate chip cookies in the house. That day she sent a small container of chocolate chip cookies back for the kids.

Well, on the way home I thought, they won’t miss just one, so I helped myself and rearranged them a little so the container still looked full and no one would know. When I rearranged, there was one cookie that didn’t fit without smashing it, so I had to get rid of that evidence. By time I arrived home, I had rationalized my way through he entire container of cookies.

I got rid of the evidence and thought no one would be the wiser… until mom talked to Amber and asked if she had enjoyed the chocolate chip cookies she sent. BUSTED!

I’d like to say I am not just older, but more mature and self disciplined these days, but the truth is, when Mom gives me chocolate chip cookies these days, she give me a little bag for the car and then one for the family… which I have to put in the trunk so I don’t eat it on the way home.

Chocolate chip cookies, especially if there is ice cream nearby are my kryptonite.

•           Well I guess, I could say the same for ice cream whether there are chocolate chip cookies nearby or not.

•           Actually, I guess I could say the same for any chocolate.

•           Truthfully, I should say not just chocolate, but any desert.

I confess, when it comes to sweets, my self-control is just about zilch! It is almost impossible for me to say “no.”

Maybe chocolate chip cookies and ice cream ate not your kryptonite.

•           But what about potato chips? Lay’s was ingenious when they began their “Betcha can’t eat just one” campaign back in 1963. They’re right. It is hard to say “no.”

•           Chips aren’t a problem for you? Then what about spending? Americans spend on average $1.33 for every dollar they earn. That 33 cents goes on a credit card. The latest I have seen was 4.79% of credit cards are delinquent.  Someone just needs to learn to say no.

•           Or maybe its anger you can’t control. A recent study shows that daily anger is up 50 percent in 5 years.  We just need to get a grip.

•           Or maybe it’s something at work. Showing up late, gossip, and complaining can be just as out of control as my sweet tooth.

•           Or maybe it is alcohol. Now I understand that alcoholism is more than a self-control issue, but a basic pattern of alcohol abuse is just a matter of self-control.

You can probably identify some area of your life in which you lack self-control. Lack of self-control can be hazardous to your health, your emotions, your work, your family, your relationships, and ultimately your relationship to God.

 Does this sound familiar? “I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate- I do.”  That is the apostle writing Romans chapter 7about 1950 years ago.

Let me tell you, though, you don’t have to be chained like a prisoner to your urges and lack of self-control. Let me explain how.

 Self-control is the steady capacity to do what you have decided to do, even when you don’t feel like it. You have self-control when you are able to do what you intend to do regardless of internal or external obstacles.

Most human beings are not very good at self-control, but the good news is that’s OK. Because what we lack, God provides. Remember that I said this series is essentially working through the fruit of the spirit from Galatians 5… “The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.”  Notice; that where your own SELF-- Self-control may be lacking… there is a supernatural self-control that grows out of our life in the Spirit.

What we are really talking about here might be clearer if we get away from the word “self control,” because that sounds like the self is in control. It might be clearer if we use the term a   “controlled self.” It is a matter of taking control of our self out of the hands of the one who can’t even keep from eating too many chocolate chip cookies, and giving control of the self to the spirit who can transform us from a life of self-control to a way of living that is  God-controlled. We have already admitted that we don’t seem able to break the chains of our bad behavior. The good news is God can.

I had us read Titus this morning because it calls each and every one of us to have a God controlled self. He starts out addressing men, then women, then specifically young women, then young men, and then slaves. We are all to live what Paul calls self-controlled lives…what we are calling God-controlled lives. The picture is clear here. Paul lists being even tempered, loving, patient, not drunken, not slanderers (which is the same root word as our word devil, so it means literally not being false accusers) being encouragers, sexually faithful, kind, and having integrity. That is the; picture Paul draws of the person who has a God-controlled self. 

But how do we get there? Obviously, Paul wasn’t there either after all he’s the one who wrote, “What I want to do I do not do, but what I hate-- I do.” That is the crux of this battle between self-control and the God controlled self.

 If you will turn with me to Romans 7 (page 157.) we see in verse 15 that pitiful desperate cry, “what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do.”

Paul continues in that chapter coming to the conclusion that if he wants to do right and can’t, there must be something… some outside force… or some inside force…keeping him from doing right,  that he calls “evil.”

•           For us, the outside evil might be the temptation to cheat on our income taxes to have enough money to buy a boat.

•           For us, the outside force might the temptation to step on our coworkers to get to the top.

•           For us, the outside force might be the pressure of our friends… none of us is that far from the teenagers’ cry. “But everyone else is doing it.”

•           For us, the outside force might be the rampant sexulization of our culture and entertainment and falling into lust, adultery, or fornication.

•           For us, the inside force might be a need for comfort so we eat too many carbohydrates.

•           For us, the inside force might be doing whatever we have to do  -right or wrong- to make sure others like us.

•           For us, the inside force might be a need to not be embarrassed so we would rather lie and cover up our mistakes, or if possible, blame someone else.

•           Or yours might be completely different ---fill in the blank.

Those are the evils that Paul says are close at hand even when we WANT to do the right thing… we seem unable to do it. Turning back to the Bible, we see that he writes in verses 21-24, “Although I want to do good, evil is right there with me. 22 For in my inner being I delight in God’s law; 23 but I see another law at work in me, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within me. 24 What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body that is subject to death?”

But my friends do not lose hope. Immediately Paul’s next sentence is, “Thanks be to God, who delivers me through Jesus Christ our Lord!”

In order to understand that, we have to move on to chapter 8 still on page 157.

 Verse 1, “There is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, For the law of the Spirit of life in Christ Jesus has set you free from the law of sin and of death.” He explains this further in verse 5. “For those who live according to the flesh set their minds on the things of the flesh, but those who live according to the Spirit set their minds on the things of the Spirit. 6 To set the mind on the flesh is death, but to set the mind on the Spirit is life and peace.”

He uses the term “to set the mind on” things of the flesh or to “set the mind on” things of the spirit. Here is the key to the whole thing.

The Greek word translated “to set the mind on,” is

•           more than “thinking about the spirit” it is

•           more than “focusing on the spirit.” It is

•           more than “desiring the spirit.” The root word refers to our diaphragm or the parts around the heart. It combines both the mind and the heart. It is setting the very heart of who we are; (mind, and heart, and spirit) on what is important to us… things of the flesh or things of the spirit. Giving the very heart of who we want to be, mind and heart and spirit, over to what is important to us…things of flesh, or things of the spirit.

The question for the day is “on what are you “setting your heart, soul, and mind?”

Are you betting your whole self in the world you know, the world of pleasure at any cost, the world of success whether it is right or wrong, the world of me, me, me. The world of SELF-ish-ness where our lives are driven by our selfish desires and whims.

•           Or are you placing your whole self in the hands of the God who, in Paul’s terms “delivers us from sin and death through Jesus Christ our Lord.”

•           Are you placing your whole self in the love of a God who came to break the chains of our temptation and sin?

•           Are you placing your heart in the hands of the Christ broke the chains of death and can break the chains that keep us from living the way God crated us to live?

•           Are you placing your whole self in the hands of the spirit that Paul says in verse 10 “is life itself?”

  What do you place at the very center of your life… yourself, or the Holy Spirit of God, which Paul describes with these words from verse 14 of chapter 8 page 158. “All who are led by the Spirit of God are children of God. 15 For you did not receive a spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received a spirit of adoption. When we cry, “Abba! Father!” 16 it is that very Spirit bearing witness with our spirit that we are children of God, 17 and if children, then heirs, heirs of God and joint heirs with Christ”

The bottom line is, sometimes self-control is just self control--- it is a matter of being smart.

•           If chocolates chip cookies are a problem for you, don’t stock your pantry with them.

•           If getting to work on time is an issue, go to bed earlier.

•           If lust is a problem, don’t keep the swimsuit issue of sports illustrated in your paper rack all year.

•           If gambling is negatively affecting your family’s security, don’t go to the casino.

•           If drinking a little too much is causing a strain in your marriage, don’t keep your favorite beverage in the house. Sometimes it is just that easy. Pick up the chain yourself, and throw it aside. Decide what you want to do, and do it.

Other times though, it is harder. It seems like that little voice keeps coming back again and again. It seems like everything we do provides an opportunity to do what we don’t want to do. It seems like the chains are just too heavy, so they hold us back and hold us down. Often times, the chains bind us to the point that the things we want to do we just can’t… and things we don’t want to do, we just can’t seem to resist.

The only answer is to give up on self-control, and start clinging with all your might to the Holy Spirit of God who gives us a God-controlled- self  by giving us new life and making us new creatures from the inside out.

 A few chapters later, Paul says it better than I ever could. “I appeal to you therefore, brothers and sisters, by the mercies of God, to present your (whole) selves as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship. 2 Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your minds,”

Let the chains be broken--- and let the transformation begin!