Speak no evil
9/4/11
“Sticks and stones may break my bones, but names will never harm me.”
Did any of you ever chant that as a
child? Maybe followed by a sticking out
your tongue at your assailant? Maybe
followed by running like the dickens to the back door of your house before they
get their hands on you?
Growing up a nerd, I remember those days well.
The sticks and stones saying is a reflection of the common
law that words do not rise to the level of legal assault. That is true.
I think it neglects to consider the impact that words can have on
us.
·
A word
might not break a bone but it can sure feel like someone has kicked you in the
stomach.
·
A word
might not blacken an eye, but have you ever noticed the eyes of a child when
they are belittled or blown off by an adult they love and respect?
·
Words will
not put us in a cast, but they can certainly immobilize people emotionally and
spiritually.
In the first sermon in this series “Me and my big mouth,”
Robyn described the power of the word of God and our words. In last week’s message, she lifted up three
stories and the promise that God will equip us with the right words when we
need them.
Today she has asked me to preach about “speak no evil” do you
suppose her choice of topics is trying to tell me something? If you don’t already know it, I have to admit
my mouth has gotten me into more trouble in my life than I care to think about.
·
I think
about the look on Amber or Richie’s face when I would snap at them.
·
I think
about all the customer service representatives upon whom I have unloaded.
·
I think
about the things I have said that have hurt or embarrassed my wife or my
family.
·
I think
of the struggle I had disciplining my mouth when one day I was working on a
construction site and the next I was hired to be a youth minister.
·
How many
times have I said something and then wished for all the world that I could
rewind time and do it all over again?
Do any of you know what I am talking about? I suspect most of you do.
The Scriptures take very seriously the power of our words to
hurt.
James 3:7 is one of my favorites “All
kinds of animals, birds, reptiles, and sea creatures are being tamed and have
been tamed by mankind, but no human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison.”
Just a verse before
James writes, “Consider what a great forest is set on fire by a small spark. The
tongue also is a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole body, sets the whole
course of one’s life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell.”
(Slide 2)Those are
some powerful words for an organ that weighs only about 6/100s of 1% of our
body weight.
The Scripture from Ephesians that we saw in the video a
minute ago and is printed in your bulletin is a great example of the scriptural
teaching about not speaking evil
(Slide 3)The first
thing I noticed is how serious Paul is about this. He groups lying and evil talk, and slander
along with Anger, Stealing, and Grieving the H.S. Jesus says being angry is the same as murder. Murder and stealing are on God’s top ten
list. And Jesus identifies grieving the
HS as an unforgivable sin! Now tell me.
How important is what we say? (click Slide)
We who would never break a commandment… do so with our tongues
without even a thought.
So what can we do?
(Slide 4) Most
simply and fundamentally, do not allow your tongue to get you in trouble. Did your mom or dad ever tell you to think
before you speak? Probably, but that is because
it is good advice. Before you
speak. Before you even take a breath in
preparation to speak….Ask yourself these questions from our Ephesians passage.
(Slide 5)Is this the truth? - or like so much speech today is it a half-truth? Is it an exaggeration? Is it a caricature? Is it misleading or deceptive? ? If
so you would do well to remember Ecclesiastes says, “There is a time to speak
and a time to keep silent”
·
(Slide 6)Then ask yourself if what you are about to say is useful. There is
an awful lot of useless talk today. The 24-hour
news cycle fills our ears with useless talk.
We are so accustomed to noise that as soon as there is silence we want
to fill it with talk, even if it is useless.
This is where we ask ourselves if what we are saying is
important enough to say. Is it going to
help anybody? Build a relationship? Shed light on who you are? Answer a pertinent question? Warn someone?
Teach something? Further the
conversation?
Or is it just yammering?
Puffing yourself up? Putting
someone down? Bringing attention to yourself or to someone else’s flaws
unnecessarily? That is useless
talk.
Are your words useful? If not you would do well to remember
Ecclesiastes says, “There is a time to speak and a time to keep silent”
·
(Slide 7)Are your words going to Build up or tear down? If your
words build a relationship, if they build love, or hope, or someone’s self
esteem, if your words build a vision for what God can do or what God is
doing. How can your speech be
wrong?
Or are you building something negative? Is it going to build hatred,
misunderstanding, worry, hopelessness, bitterness, or anger? Those words cannot be right.
It might not always be clear whether what you are going to
say builds up, but it is usually pretty clear if it is going to tear down. Is it going to damage a relationship, a
reputation, a hope, a dream? Is it going
to tear down someone’s self-esteem, even your self-esteem? Is it going to tear down hard work that someone
has offered? Is it going to belittle
someone? Is it going to make someone
feel unimportant, or unloved, or unwanted?
If so you would do well to remember Ecclesiastes says, “There is a time
to speak and a time to keep silent”
·
(Slide 8)Are your words filled with grace or something else? Are your
words a gift or a stab in the back? Are
your words graceful or judgmental? I
think this has to do with the motivation for our words. Are they coming from a place of love,
generosity, caring, hope, joy, truthfulness and a desire to be the best that
God has made you, and give the best God has given you?
This is where we examine our own motivations and reasons for
speaking. Truthfulness, usefulness, and
building up are objective. They are
happening outside of you and you are examining the nature of or the effect of
your words.
Asking if your words are graceful is an internal, subjective
question. Why am I saying this? What do I hope to do? Is this for me or for God? Is this to build myself up at their expense
or is this useful? In your heart of
hearts, are you speaking from a position of grace or a position judgment?
(Slide 9)
v Truth or lie?
v Useful or empty blather?
v Building up or tearing down?
v Graceful or judgmental?
Those are the criteria Paul gives us to measure our speech.
(Slide 10)
Finally, very briefly, Along with speak no evil I want to address
what we hear. Is there lots of evil,
idle, mean spirited, hurtful talk out there?
You know there is. Is there a lot
of sinful talk out there?
Absolutely.
Most of us have trouble controlling our own big mouths let
alone others. The truth is we can’t
control other’s big mouths.
But if we willingly soak in everything we hear, the bad along
with the good. It will destroy us.
Proverbs 4:24 says “Put away from you crooked speech, and put
devious talk far from you.”
This doesn’t mean we
get to ignore the reality of the news around us.
But it means that when someone starts speaking evil, we are
to get out of the way.
When someone starts to speak in lies, we have to protect our
hearts.
When someone starts to gossip, we are to run the other
direction.
When someone starts to speak uselessly and destructively, we
have permission to turn our back and walk away.
In fact, it is stronger than that-- we are commanded to put all that
talk far from us.
Don’t
participate. Don’t let it get inside of
you. Because whatever you put in is what
will eventually come out. And then we
are right back to the first part of the sermon. The lies you listen to will work on you and
will eventually come out. The useless
things you listen to will eventually come out.
Listen to things that tear down and you will be torn down. Listen to things that build ugly walls and
you will find yourself on the wrong side of the wall. Listen to things that hurt you and you will
be hurt. Just put them off. I know easier said than done. But Don’t let it in you. Just don’t.
Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words that come out
of my mouth, and the words that go into my heart via my ears, can hurt me where
no one else will ever know. Speak no
evil and hear no evil speaking.
AMEN
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