Real Help for Real People: depression
and discouragement
RUMC 7/3/16
Is there anyone here who does not
understand what the Psalmist is saying when he says, “Why are you cast down, O
my soul, and why are you disquieted within me?”
When life takes a nosedive and nothing is
going right. When the car won’t start, the dog poops on the carpet, and the
bank can’t find any record of your last deposit, is there anyone who doesn’t
think there must be someone out to get them?
How many of you, can remember a time in
your life, maybe after the death of a loved one, the loss of a job or the
ending of a relationship when you just didn’t feel right. The world didn’t look
as colorful and the music didn’t make you feel as joyful?
Look at the person next to you.
Statistically one of the two of you has or will experience an episode of major
depression in your lifetime.
Let me ask you again. Is there anyone
here who does not understand what the Psalmist is saying when he says, “Why are
you cast down, O my soul, and why are you disquieted within me?”
The message Bible says, “Why are you
down in the dumps, dear soul? Why are you crying the blues?”
The common English Bible says. “Why…
are you so depressed? Why are you so upset inside?”
Let me say right off the bat that we
are dealing with three very different things today: discouragement, depression,
and clinical depression.
1. Discouragement
is a typical, healthy response to the frustrations that we all face from time
to time. When the car won’t start, the dog has an accident and the checking
account is overdrawn, we lose hope and confidence. We know that these things
just happen, but we still get discouraged. We all experience it. We can’t avoid
it. It is a universal experience. And eventually we bounce back.
2. Depression,
on the other hand, is losing hope and confidence because of something inside of
us. It might be the hurt from the death of a family member, the loss of a job,
receiving harsh criticism from someone you respect, or family trouble. Those
kinds of events can make anyone feel sad, lonely, scared, nervous, or anxious.
Compared to discouragement, which is always caused by outside events,
depression has more to do with the insides of us. An event might be a trigger,
but depression changes the way we feel, the way we think, and the way we view
ourselves. Everyone gets depressed sometimes. That is being human and having a
heart that can be broken.
3. Finally,
there is clinical depression. Common depression is not an illness, but part of
being human. Clinical depression, however, is an illness caused by
irregularities in the neurotransmitters in the brain. We may blame something
outside of us. We may blame ourselves. But the truth is that our brains don’t
work quite right and it affects every part of our living. Clinical depression
is a life threatening illness that should be treated by professionals with
therapy and often medication. There are Christians who think that real
Christians should not be depressed, but that is as silly as saying that real
Christians shouldn’t have diabetes or heart disease.
Most of you know that I have lived with
clinical depression for most of my life. I have spent a lot of time asking what
it means to be a Christian who has depression. But you do not have to have a
mental illness to understand the darkness of discouragement and depression.
Whether we are discouraged or
depressed, I have come to believe that our faith does have something to say to
all of us. Whether you are discouraged or depressed, the Psalms are a place you
can turn to find real help for real people.
Psalms 42 and 43 are the psalms for today. I
take the two of them together because many people believe that they were
originally one psalm or they were intended to be used together. We can all see
why that is; when we notice the same chorus used three times word for word in
Psalm 42 and Psalm 43.
Why are you cast down, O my soul, and
why are you disquieted within me?
Hope in God; for I shall again praise
him, my help and my God.
When we read David’s description of
himself, he sure sounds depressed.
• He
describes his countenance as cast down. He is crying day and night and lost his
appetite. He is poured out or drained of energy. He is overwhelmed like he is
drowning. He feels as though his bones are shattering, which might describe the
very real physical symptoms such as headaches, digestive disorders, and chronic
pain which accompany severe depression. He is disturbed and anxious, abandoned,
even abandoned by God. And he is confused.
He is fighting discouragement, fighting
depression; he is fighting for hope. He says, “I will hope in God; for I shall
again praise him, my help and my God.”
The first important thing to notice; he IS fighting.
Think back to a time of depression or
discouragement. Didn’t you just want to throw your hands up and walk away? Did
you feel like giving up and running away? Did it zap you of your energy so all
you could think about was lying down and sleeping it off?
Discouragement and depression do
terrible things to us. Either we want to eat more, or we may lose our appetite.
Either we want to sleep all the time, or maybe none at all. Either we lash out
at those near us, or we beat up on ourselves. Either we become forgetful, or we
keep going over the same thoughts, again and again. Often we may want to
withdraw or hide. Everyone’s experience is unique. One of the most common
feelings, though, is feeling overwhelmed to the point that we feel powerless.”
I can’t do anything right.” “They’ll never change.” “It will never get better.”
“Everybody hates me, or is laughing at me, or knows that I am a fraud.” Thos
are the things we say to ourselves, right? I can only go from my experience,
but I think feeling overwhelmed and feeling powerless are pretty universal
thoughts.
We all know the feeling of being
overwhelmed and powerless, and we know how hard it is to just move let alone
move on and do anything positive. But listen to the Psalmist "Why are you
cast down, O my soul and why are you disquieted within me? “ I WILL HOPE IN
GOD.
David is bound and determined not to
give in to the sense of powerlessness. He is determined to do something. He is
firmly committed to having HOPE IN GOD.
The truth is, we might feel paralyzed,
but we are not. God gave us free will and not even discouragement and
depression can take that away. Even if the chemicals in your brain are out of
whack… you still have free will.
When I am at my worst, there are times
when I think it is all I can do to just lie on the couch and cover my eyes. It
feels like that is all there is… It feels like I am incapable of anything else.
But when I put my mind to it, I find that I can make a choice… I do have free
will. I can chose to wallow in my own darkness, or like David, I can chose to
exercise the free will God gave me. I will hope in God. I will get up and move.
I will go to work. I will do whatever I can.
I know what it is like to be paralyzed.
I am not discounting that. I also know that the longer I do nothing the harder
it is to do something. I am not saying this is easy. And usually it does not
make me feel better. I am not saying this is a cure. I am saying that even when
we feel like we don’t we have a choice. God has not left us powerless. We are
still given the gift of free will. David was committed to fighting back, and we
can to, because God will not leave us powerless.
“I will hope in God; for I shall again
praise him, my help and my God.”
The second thing we notice in is that David
wills himself to see a future. “For I shall again praise him.” He has to
convince himself that things won’t always be this bad. He will someday be able
to praise God.
When we are discouraged and depressed,
our tendency is to believe that we will always feel that way. “I failed, and I
will always be known as a failure. I lost my job, and I’ll never find another.
My spouse left me, and I will never find anyone again.” You know what I mean.
Actually, at my worst, I can go a step
further saying it always has been like this, and it always will be like this. I
have always have, and always will feel as bad as I do right now. You might
think it is crazy, but think back and I suspect you can identify a time when
you felt like things were never, ever going to get any better.
David plays the role of a Cognitive
Behavioral Therapist naming our cognitive distortions and models for us an
undistorted thought… that what is, is not what will always be. Someday I will
praise God again. Someday people will forget this mistake. Someday someone will
love me again. Someday I will feel better. Maybe not tomorrow, or even next
week. But someday…As hard as it is to believe when you are in the midst of
discouragement and depression there is hope and there is a future.
That hope and that future is in God.
God will give us a hope and a future, if we will open our eyes and see.
“I will hope in God; for I shall again
praise him, my help and my God.”
Finally we read David describe God as “my help
and my God.” Remember I said that David felt abandoned by God? He writes, “As a
deer longs for flowing streams, so my soul longs for you, O God. My soul
thirsts for God, for the living God. When shall I come and behold the face of
God?” In verse 4, he remembers how he used to lead the procession in worship.
In verse 9 he writes, “I say to God, my rock, why have you forgotten me?”
Apparently, everyone else could see it
too, because David writes, “people say to me continually, “Where is your God?
We don’t know the circumstances of
David’s writing this Psalm. Perhaps he was being pursued by Solomon or Absolom,
or maybe he was in the midst of personal turmoil. It seems likely that he was
on the run, away from the worshipping community.
But as bad as things got, David still
declares. “My help and my God.” In verse 8, he affirms, “By day the Lord
commands his steadfast love, and at night his song is with me, a prayer to the
God of my life.” Steadfast love. Does that take you back the first sermon I
preached in this series? Psalm 118? “Oh give thanks to the Lord, for he is
good; for his steadfast love endures forever!” In the midst of his
discouragement and depression, David found the strength to remember God’s
steadfast love. He remembers that no matter how badly we make a mess of things
his steadfast love endures forever!” No matter how badly we fail his steadfast
love endures forever!” No matter what others may think of us his steadfast love
endures forever!” No matter how badly we may feel his steadfast love endures
forever!” No matter who is attacking us from the outside, or how viciously our
discouragement and depression attack us from the inside his steadfast love
endures forever!”
As hard as it is, that is a truth on
which I stand that will never fail. That is a truth on which you can depend no
matter what is happening around you, or inside of you, and no matter how sick
you are God will love you through this no matter what. No matter how
discouraged you are, God will love you through this no matter what. No matter
how depressed you are, God will love you through this. No matter how ill you
are, God will love you through this… no matter what.
As I was preparing for this series, I was very careful about looking for
Psalms that provide real help. The truth is real people like you and I get
discouraged sometimes. Real people like you and I get depressed sometimes.
Over the years, I have heard the
nonsense spouted by the Christians who say real Christians should not be
discouraged or depressed. They say just pray and God will heal you, just rest
in the joy of the Lord, they say if you just had enough faith you wouldn’t feel
that way. I just wish they would mind their own business because those are some
of the least helpful things I have ever heard.
I think… I hope… that this quick look
at psalms 42-43 has provided some real help. I hope it has helped you to see
that this Psalm offers a good model of how we as faithful people can cope with
discouragement and depression.
1. God
has not left you powerless- do something
2. God
will give you hope a future- if you will see it
3. God
will love you through this no matter what.
Hold tight to that truth… No matter
what.
AMEN
